Hello all! Apologies for not posting till now, this past semester was a lot more than I was expecting it to be. However, I made it through with flying colors! Yay! So the last time I posted was not long after the new year and I made a resolution to give up make up for an extended period of time. I sadly am not able to keep that resolution for the whole year due to my internship, a girl's gotta look professional am I right? But the five months I did keep it was a challenging one, at least it was at first. I felt naked and exposed to the world. All of my blemishes out for the world to see, and yet, I was able to draw closer to people because I didn't rely on my looks to break the ice but had to rely on my personality. I also found that I viewed myself as not worth looking at, for example, whenever I passed a cute guy on campus I would avert my eyes and think that i didn't stand a chance getting a glance from him. The first few months really got me in my insecurities, it bruised my ego. And then one day it finally happened.
The first few months really got me in my insecurities, it bruised my ego. And then one day it finally happened
I was going to my schools spring formal and decided to wear some makeup for it... I was so excited! I was going to show everyone what I was really made of, how beautiful I could really be! And yet when finished applying the layers and layers of contour, foundation, and artistically made up eyes, I look at the finished product and didn't like what I saw. What was looking back at me was not the Asten Davis I have gotten to know in the past few months, it was a girl who was trying too hard to cover up who she really was. I kept it on of course, I'm not one to waste hard work, however, I was uncomfortable in my skin during the whole party and simply wanted to go home and wipe my face clean. After several hours I finally made it home, I stripped off my heels and ran straight to the bathroom, and after all of the paint had been removed from my face I looked at the raw, blemished, beautiful girl that God had made perfect in his eyes and I smiled. And from that moment on I knew exactly who I was and walked with a new confidence I have never known before. Although I am wearing makeup again, it's different now. Now I wear minimal amounts that bring out my features rather than allowing it to hide them, and live life in full confidence.
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